Forgive me for my absence in the blogging world lately. I tell myself continually that blogging "just isn't my thing." I can't seem to stay with it! However, I am forcing myself [literally] to sit down and write this blog entry. Not because people are dying to read anything I write. Although, I am thankful for the slim few people who do read this silly thing :) I am writing this post to preserve these thoughts, ideas and feelings swirling around in my head.
A dear friend shared this blog with me today. I cannot stop reading it for the life of me! Warning- if you have any interest, concern, or heart for missions, the poor, or the gospel of Jesus Christ whatsoever- you will most likely be addicted to reading this incredible woman's journey in Uganda.
Reading this amazing woman's story in blog format has come at quite an interesting time for me. To make a very long and complicated story as short as possible, I love missions. Specifically, I love Kenya. God began to open my eyes to Africa in the 9th grade. I remember it clearly. All of a sudden, I was doing research on this continent that I was becoming enthralled with. It wasn't for a school assignment; no one was forcing me to learn about Africa. Furthermore, when I was in the 9th grade, Africa wasn't trendy. I just wanted to know about the people who lived there because I loved them. I loved them in a pure, real way that could never come from the selfish, depraved person I am apart from Christ.
God so graciously and perfectly orchestrated my steps to Kenya on two separate summer trips. From those two trips, my heart was broken, filled with inexplicable JOY and changed for the rest of my life. Very recently, I have been talking to a few close friends about redefining this passion God stirred in my heart so many years ago. It is not at all that this passion has dwindled. In fact, sometimes it feels stronger than ever. More exactly, it feels like a dull ache within my heart. An ache for the Kingdom to come in a corrupt and barren land.
This certain blog entry from this amazing woman, named Katie, was particularly inspiring, challenging, and heartbreaking to read. Katie talks about what she gave up to move to Uganda, adopt her once-orphaned children, and change her life forever.
"So, you want to be a missionary, huh?"
Katie talked about counting the cost of the cross of Christ. I hope you'll read her post. She eloquently puts into words what I've been asking my heart for a long time. More importantly, what Jesus has been asking my heart. It's easy to look at missions and think it's for the "elite Christian" or maybe even the "fanatical Christian." I won't get on my soapbox about missions, don't worry. And I'm not at all saying every Believer must sell everything they own and move to a third world country to live forevermore.
My desire is to be accountable to the One I'm following, to trust His word and spend my life on the least of these until there is nothing left of me to give. I want to count the cost. I don't want Jesus to look at me and say, "I was hungry, but you didn't feed me. I was thirsty, but you didn't offer me a drink. I was naked, and you didn't clothe me."
Please pray for my heart as I try to diligently seek out God's desire for me.